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Rating: T
Genre: Angst, family, AU
Spoilers/Warnings: Spoilers fair game through 3.13. My version of the end.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Title courtesy Eliot's "The Hollow Men"
Notes: This fic is completely and totally dedicated 100 percent to
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authoressnebula . Not only did one of her thoughts in her journal inspire the beginning of it ages ago, but her recent fic "War Is Over" inspired me to get my rear in gear and finish it. So here you go, Neb. Hope you enjoy mine as much as I enjoyed yours.Notes the second: Do I think this is how Kripke & Co. are going to end it? No. Do I care? Not really. This is fanfiction, after all. ~_^ Also, running unbeta'd again.
Notes the third: I'm counting this one as another one of my "experimental" fics, mostly because of the style, but partly because of the content. (I've never really conjectured anything before... I usually set my stories farther back in the series.)
Summary: On the first day of the beginning of The End, Dean doesn't even know what's going on.
“In this last of meeting places
We grope together
And avoid speech
Gathered on this beach of the tumid river”
- T. S. Eliot, “The Hollow Men”
On the first day of the beginning of The End, Dean doesn’t even know what’s going on. All he knows is that when he gets back from a first-aid-and-dinner run, Sam is gone.
At first, Dean’s more ticked than worried, mainly because all of Sam’s stuff is still in the room – a sign that Sam plans on coming back. There’s no note, and Sam’s phone is on the table, but his jacket is gone. Dean puts the first aid supplies into the kit, eats dinner, and watches the first half of the original Star Wars before he lets his eyes start flicking to the door more than once every five minutes. He figures (hopes) that Sam’s on a walk, and he’s more than likely fine – he’s spent enough time on his own with no one to back him up, after all. True, there wasn’t a real reason for Sam needing to take such a long walk (unless, of course, Sam wasn’t really out by himself walking). They hadn’t really had a fight for the last few weeks, but the tension is definitely there (and has been ever since Dean came back, really).
Dean spends the entire night sitting on his bed with his eyes glued to the door, trying not to think about Sam with his hand outstretched and his eyes turning yellow. Maybe Sam is with Ruby, maybe he’s delving even deeper into the dark destiny that awaits him, but Dean figures (prays) he’ll come back. Even after everything that’s happened over the last few months, Sam always comes back. Against his inner instinct, Dean doesn’t go out looking for his brother that first night.
He quickly decides that was the worst mistake of his life.
*****
By the third day of the beginning of The End, Dean is running on desperation, a gallon of coffee, and an hour of sleep. He still doesn’t know what’s going on, but the only thing he knows – and the only thing that matters – is that Sam went out and never came back.
Because Dean knows Sam did go on a walk now – the clerk at the front desk had mentioned seeing him leave. Dean is mildly creeped out by that because of the fact that the front desk is on the opposite end of the building, so there’s no way the clerk could have seen Sam leave in the dark. One hard glare has the kid spilling his guts about wanting to keep an eye on Sam because he was just so… so something that Dean never discovers – he cuts the kid off by saying his brother’s got a girlfriend (and sure, maybe he’s exaggerating just a little, and maybe he’s a little brusque, but that doesn’t give the kid permission to practically bawl at the news). But he doesn’t react at all when Dean “accidentally” spills holy water on him and mutters “Christo” under his breath, and he’s way too small and thin to have done any kind of damage to the giant that is Sam Winchester, so that lead quickly pans out.
The most frustrating thing is that with all of his supernatural connections, he should be able to track down his brother no problem, but Dean can’t get a hold of any of them when he needs them the most. All thoughts, hopes, wishes, and rants have not brought Castiel to his doorstep, and Dean is just far enough on this side of desperation that he doesn’t want to try and summon Ruby. Bobby’s tracking spells on the second day turned up nothing, and Dean hasn’t been able to figure out any other way of tracking Sam down.
Dean’s standing in the middle of the room, one hand fisted in his hair and the other rubbing at his face, when a loud knock on the door jolts him from thoughts. He yanks the door open, hoping beyond hope that Castiel has developed some human tendencies and decided to knock instead of suddenly appearing behind Dean when he was least expecting it.
It’s not Castiel, but at this point Bobby is the next-best thing (better, actually, since Bobby showed up) so Dean gladly opens the door wide enough to let the older hunter in. Bobby wastes just enough time to clap Dean on the shoulder once for reassurance before they’re bent over the table, scanning Sam’s journal, Dean’s journal, John’s journal, and two ancient books (one written in Latin and the other in a very archaic form of Greek) that Bobby had brought along to translate.
By the end of the fourth day, Dean’s running on desperation, two gallons of coffee, and three hours of sleep, and all he’s been able to do is imprint Latin spells preventing wood rot in his brain and curse out the jerk that made ancient Greek so frustratingly difficult to translate.
*****
On the fifth day of the beginning of The End, Dean finally gets a break. Bobby’s convinced him to spare twenty minutes to take a decent shower and eat something that’s not been prepackaged in cellophane. The only reason Dean agrees is because he needs to go back to the library to do some more research, and he doesn’t think the librarian or the other patrons will appreciate him smelling like road kill while he does his work.
Dean is stepping out of the shower, already pulling on a clean pair of jeans, when he spots the message hastily scrawled on the mirror. It’s faint, messy, and only shows up because of the steam billowing out of the shower stall, but it’s definitely Sam’s handwriting.
Pr. 4:23
It takes a moment before Dean stops beating himself over it (Sam had left him a note all this time, and he had missed it and if he had just taken a shower that first night like he had thought of, he would’ve seen it) before he realizes what the message means. He storms out of the bathroom, bypassing Bobby, who’s wielding a plateful of pancakes, and moving to the small table with the drawer. Yanking it open, he pulls out the Bible with the beat-up red cover and fading gold letters and flips it open to Proverbs.
“Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life.”
Dean puzzles at the choice of the verse for only a moment before he rotates the Bible a quarter-turn so he can see Sam’s minute handwriting scribbled in the margin.
I’m #66.
And suddenly the world comes to a crashing halt as Dean realizes just why Sam walked out. Sam is the final freakin’ seal, and as soon as he’d found out, he’d left because he hadn’t protected his heart with the diligence mentioned in the verse – he’d been too busy trying to develop his demon-given powers – and it more than likely made him even more vulnerable to becoming the seal.
Dean has never been more proud and scared in his life – so, so proud because that’s his Sammy, the Sammy that fought tooth and nail to be normal, the Sammy that never would have even considered the possibility of working with a demon, the Sammy that never would have crossed the line if it meant losing his soul; so freakin’ scared because that’s his Sammy, the Sammy he’s been watching out for since he was four years old, the Sammy with big eyes shining out from underneath too-long hair that would beg for a bedtime story, the Sammy that’s now out there somewhere facing who-knows-what without his big brother there to be his shield.
Bobby’s startled gasp and a whisper of air are all the warning Dean has before a hand lands on his shoulder and a familiar voice growls, “It’s time.”
*****
At the beginning of The End, Dean finally finds Sam, and it’s the last place he expected his brother to be.
Dean barely has time to blink before Uriel takes Dean out of the motel room and into what seems to be the middle of nowhere but proves to be quite familiar. In a strange twist of fate (or maybe in a typical twist of Winchester luck), The End begins just outside of Cold Oak, South Dakota. The sky is gray and lights up every so often with a flash of lightning, but it’s not roiling or rumbling in an apocalyptic way like Dean had always thought it would.
As soon as everything stops spinning, Dean sees that Uriel has brought him to the front lines on Heaven’s side. Dozens of angels are lined up in a group ten angels wide and six angels deep. He can’t see the angels, but the dust swirls where each of them are standing, and the sheer power in the air confirms their presence. They’re each facing south, where something dark is stirring, and Dean knows that it’s Lilith and her minions coming for them.
But that’s not the thing that’s making his heart pound, because in less than a second he’s spotted Sam.
Sam’s smiling faintly at him from his stance at the forefront of Heaven’s forces. Castiel is standing on his right, and there’s a notable gap on his left that just happens to be at the very center of the front line. The whites of Sam’s eyes are tinged with yellow, and there’s a dark cross drawn on his forehead in ash. Dean knows that the cross is symbolic of the power keeping Sam in check, preventing him from carrying out the destiny Azazel had always intended for him, and Dean doesn’t really know how he knows that, but at this point he doesn’t really care.
Without another word Dean walks over to stand in the open spot next to his brother, and Uriel falls into line on the other side of Castiel. They stand silently, staring ahead at the mass of demons on the far horizon.
Lightning cracks, and the air suddenly changes. The mass of shadows off in the distance starts running toward them, and behind him, Dean can hear a few angels stirring in unease.
“Peace.”
The voices that speak in unison have an instantaneous effect. The angels stop moving, and Dean can literally feel their resolves stiffen as he glances out of the corner of his eye at his brother and Castiel. Both are meant to lead, but it’s not until Sam glances back at him that Dean realizes he’s spoken, too.
As the mass of demons nears, Dean feels something slip in to his right hand. He glances over and sees Sam handing him Ruby’s knife. Dean swallows as he tightens his grip around the handle and stares up at his brother. For the first time in what feels like a lifetime, they speak without talking, saying everything they need to say in a quick set of glances. Dean can’t help but send up a quick prayer of thanks to the God he's finally starting to believe in – he may not want the world to end, but as long as his brother’s standing next to him and not against him, he can take anything Lilith and her kind can throw at him.
Then they turn to face the onslaught. Dean takes a slight step forward and to the right, the back of his right arm just brushing the front of Sam’s left – a defiant challenge to Hell’s forces to try and get past him, a silent promise to Sam that he's going to protect him until The End, just like he's always done. The light pressure on his arm lets him know Sam feels the same. With a grim smile, Dean adjusts the grip on the knife and raises it into the air with a shout.
As one, heaven’s forces move forward, led by two human warriors, to meet The End that’s racing toward them.
*****
On the first day of life after The End, two bruised and bloodied figures sit on the ground, legs dangling over the edge of a vast crater gouged in the ground in the middle of the United States, watching the first of many sunrises to come.
End.
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*flails*
LOVE. So much love for this, and it was dedicated to ME! *spins in a circle* That is SO AWESOME. Thank you so much sweetpea!!! EEE I love this!!
~Nebula
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Awesome is my word for the day. I can't stop using it :)
I though, expect it to end in a completely different way ...
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But I'm glad you liked it. ^_^
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But like you said, Kripke does do the unexpected. Not many thought Dean would actually go to hell but he did. So whatever happens it'll be a surprise and it will be good!